What Men Desire – The Forsaken Whisperer
Today’s blog might be helpful to some, and confusing to others, but in all honesty, people need to know and sometimes thinking you know doesn’t always mean you do.
If you were to ask your man what he wants in the bedroom, do you honestly think he is going to just tell you? No! He is going to get embarrassed, shy away and maybe even change the subject, because just like you and me, if someone had to come to you, being your partner or random stranger, and asks you what you desire in the bedroom out of nowhere you will shy away, not because it embarrassing that they are asking, it’s because you’re too embarrassed to tell them.
I am an extremely outspoken person and I have been with my partner for 11 years, and when he asked me what my desire was in the bedroom I shied away and shimmied out that room so quickly that I think I left a puff of smoke behind (I have since learned that I can trust him to understand my needs and wants).
Yes, it’s a sensitive subject and people do tend to feel embarrassed about their desires, even though it is very normal, but this blog is here to help break it down a little bit to get a general understanding of what men desire but cannot or are too scared to ask for.
This is just an idea of what men want, not all men, but most men. It gives you a little insight as to what roughly 80% of men look for. They would love to tell you about their desire, it does mostly come from porn sites where most men actually learned about their fantasies, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with it (unless he does have an addiction to it), but it’s hard for men to tell you what they want without being judged the same goes for women , so please be open minded, make him feel comfortable about being able to tell you and don’t have a complete meltdown reaction if he does decide to tell you and you don’t like it, in essence you asked for it.
Confidence
Men love it when a woman is confident, you need to prove to him and show him how lucky he is to have you in bed with him. And ladies, I PROMISE you, he isn’t looking at the cellulite on your thighs, or the stretch marks across your boobs or the tummy you have developed (probably because of him spoiling you or creating a child with you), his hands will be all over those thighs, his face between those boobs and his body pressed against yours, he isn’t seeing those things at all if he is with you, less so if you’re strutting your stuff in front of him and showing him what a goddess you really are.
Control
A man does not always want to be in control, he sometimes also just wants to be sitting relaxing thinking about whatever men think about, and you walk up to him and make the first move. It is such a massive turn on for men when they don’t expect it and a woman literally shows him what she wants. Take the reigns, you guys have had sex before, what’s the difference going to be if you start it first? He will probably give you the time of your life if you initiate it!
Also, take control in the bedroom, TELL him what you want and how you want it done, he will happily oblige!
Turning yourself on
For men, its usually quite easy to get in the mood, but for women it’s a process….so ladies, take the time to help him out a little, because it can be tiresome for him too. Get yourself all hot and heavy for him, if that means you need to listen to certain music, take a peek at the porn you enjoy or maybe even reading a nice romance book get yourself into the mood instead of expecting him to do it! How did you do it before you met him anyway? Well, do that and then invite him to join!
Praise him!
Ah, that ego boost that men live for. Have you ever seen a man’s reaction when someone comments on something he is proud of? Like his car, or his handy work or even his kids? Well, try giving him that feeling while you two are busy in the bedroom (or wherever you’re busy) and see how energetic and excited and confident he gets in that moment. I don’t mean telling him how good he is in bed every 2 minutes, but comment how good he feels inside of you, tell him how much you enjoy his dick, tell him how sexy he is or even moan a little louder as he is pounding in to you (just be very aware if you have kids around) but like women, men also need that confidence boost once in a while.
New things
Like women, men get bored with the same thing’s day in and day out. Sex should not be on a schedule and definitely not in the same position every time! Try to find out what his fantasies are, ask him in a subtle way, like “What would you like to see me in?”, “Do you think I would look sexy in this?” or “ I thought of getting myself something sexy to wear, send me some pictures of the stuff you think I would look good in”, this will give you the idea as to what he likes and you can then take it from there.
Research ladies! Look up new positions and when it comes time to have sex, suggest the new position to him, don’t make it too complicated, start of easy and progress from there.
If you are confident enough at this point, ask him if he would like to look in to adding a sex toy or a sex game into the mix to spice things up! Suggest things you guys have never ever tried before, like anal (most men are dying to try this), restraints (you tie him up or vice versa) blindfolds, even trying out some spanking with whips and paddles. He will most probably get excited with these ideas as this can lead to a whole new adventure and a whole new level to your intimacy as a couple.
Become your husbands wildest fantasy and become his very own Porn Star.
Surprise
Once in a while, surprise him and spoil yourself! Women generally love shopping, how about shopping for lingerie, or even a beautiful pair of heels and maybe even that little black dress every woman should have in their closet. Better yet, Fish net stockings…. Men just love fishnet stockings for some reason…..
Anyway, get yourself something to surprise him with and that will distract him from the fact that you just spent the money on the item….
Lingerie – Put it on, lay on the bed and call him to the room.
Heels – just walk up to him in nothing but those heels….
Little black dress – wear it without underwear and just pretend to pick something up off the ground, but don’t bend those knees, just lean down, and expose the goodies!
Fishnet stockings – Oversized t-shirt or hoodie with a pair of fishnets (no undies) on and pretend it’s a normal thing to wear around the house, he will notice, and he will definitely react!
Or better yet, plan a date and dress up for him, do the whole combo and I guarantee that night will end with a bang!
Also consider surprising him with a toy or something kinky that you can both use and enjoy,
Kinky
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do! Bring that freak out of the shadows of your mind and let her loose in the bedroom! From role-play to orders of what you want or even bringing out your kinks and showing him, it will excite him even more to see that side of you. But fair warning, don’t scare him on the first go! Ease him into it, I know you ladies! You’re here on this blog for a reason you naughty vixen!
Spontaneity
Like mentioned before, Sex should never be on a schedule! What I am telling you is never put a time or place on sex and don’t plan it out too much. Intimacy is its best when it is spontaneous and unexpected.
If you feel horny, go in search of your man, and do the deed! He will react fast and give you what you need.
What women tend to do is ignore their horniness and think to themselves that if they wait they will “probably” be horny later. Ladies….IT DOESN’T WORK LIKE THAT! Just do, enjoy it and enjoy him, and be sneaky with him as well. Scenario: the kids are in the house playing somewhere and you and hubby sneak off and maybe get frisky around the corner or in a room (Don’t lie, you have done it. There is nothing wrong with it unless you get caught!) or if you don’t have kids and you have friends around you, sneak off somewhere private and have a manic make out session and touch each other, he will love it!
You need to learn to enjoy spontaneous sex or even just groping! It’s the BEST!
Independently ambitious
Ladies, ladies, ladies…. Stop relying on men! YES, relying on them makes them feel manly sometimes, but it also puts a hell of a lot of stress on them and stress affects their manhood! Do what you know you can do, be independent and ambitious! When men see you doing the things you usually ask them to do, it puts thoughts in their head in two ways.
1. He will wonder why you didn’t ask him.
2. He will be impressed that you managed to do it yourself!
Prove to him that you are more than capable of doing things yourself, but you don’t want to so that’s why you ask him.
When it comes to ambition, showing the man in your life that when you want something you will do anything you can to get it, it proves to him that he made the right choice with you and that you aren’t here for him to do everything, but in fact that you are his equal. It takes a lot of the burden from him and gives him more energy to burn on you!
That whole Boss Bitch vibe is a serious turn on for men!
Communication
There is this saying that EVERYONE should know! “Communication is key”.
That key will unlock doors to the most satisfying sex life and relationship you will ever have. Speak to your partner, be open with him, tell him your likes and dislikes, but not in a nasty way or with an attitude, but speak from the heart, be open with everything you desire and want in your relationship and sex life.
Yes everyone has their dark secrets that you don’t want anyone to know about, but that, you must decide on your own if you want to share it with him, but don’t hide your dark desires from him, tell him how you want things and also the things you want to try, listen to what he wants to try (and be open minded about it), you never know, you both might find new things you both enjoy by just being open and honest about it.
And as mentioned before, if you are open with him, he will be open with you. Its all about trust.
Ladies, it’s been lovely giving you this information, but now it’s time for you to try out the pointers and go have fun!
But, if your man does not enjoy any of the above mentioned things and doesn’t want to do anything with you or to you and doesn’t want to speak about your sex life, then throw him away and find someone who does, because you also deserve happiness, intimacy and sex!